Today’s Practice:

Challenge yourself to not react emotionally or label you child’s behavior. Instead, ask questions to help them learn how to articulate how they are feeling. You can reflect what you are sensing your child is feeling as in “it seems as if you get frustrated with me when I give you advice,” or “It must be disappointing to have your game cancelled.”

The key is not to give advice or interpret. Instead, imagine you are holding up a large mirror reflecting back to your child what they are communicating through their behaviors, and coach them that is okay to share how they are feeling. The ability to articulate one’s feelings is one aspect of what is known as emotional intelligence.

Marc Brackett

Marc Brackett is a research psychologist and the Founding Director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and Professor in the Child Study Center at Yale University. He is the author of Permission to Feel: Unlocking the Power of Emotions to Help Our Kids, Ourselves, and Our Society Thrive.